Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Low-Down Sunday Morning

The Seven Deadly Sins have their own website. I'd send them a letter of congratulations but that might make them feel pride in their own accomplishment.

I felt like I needed a refresher on them, since surely one of them is behind every joyfulness-killing blunder. Which one this time? According to
their site:

Pride is excessive belief in one's own abilities, that interferes with the individual's recognition of the grace of God. It has been called the sin from which all others arise. Pride is also known as Vanity.
Envy is the desire for others' traits, status, abilities, or situation.
Gluttony is an inordinate desire to consume more than that which one requires.
Lust is an inordinate craving for the pleasures of the body.
Anger is manifested in the individual who spurns love and opts instead for fury. It is also known as Wrath.
Greed is the desire for material wealth or gain, ignoring the realm of the spiritual. It is also called Avarice or Covetousness.
Sloth is the avoidance of physical or spiritual work.

I think Pride may have killed my Fun Saturday Night.

First, given my previous post, I was thinking along the lines of how it might be fun to document what a suburban Super Walmart looks like after 2:00 am. The purpose of our trip was to buy birthday gifts for two 8 year-old friends of my daughter. We needed to get them that night for a swimming party to which we'd take her at the God-forsaken-jive-hour of 10:00 am the next morning.

Then Pride reminded me of other approaches to the photo shoot. It told me I should feel "special" because I can so happily bask in a heretofore unknown experience of bliss with a man I'd known for twenty years before figuring out such a thing was possible.

Then Pride said, "Take pictures of your man in action and show how silly you both are how much fun you have. Never reveal that it is not always blissful. Never reveal that when it's not, it's usually because of me, Pride, masquerading as self-importance and telling you what to do. Now, be a good girl and listen. Do what I say. Paint the lovely picture of your Walmart escapades and maybe my sister, Envy, will visit others. Oh, forget I said that because then you won't do what I want you to do. Now. Go out and document your fun times with photos and we'll visit later."

I obediently listened.

"Renard, let me take your picture in the empty Walmart parking lot."

He said he'd rather not be photographed. OK. I didn't tell him why I wanted to take photos and he didn't ask at first. Nice shot of empty aisles. He's becoming curious about my mission and I give him some kind of brush-off.

Off to the toy area. As I look around, he jumps on a banana bike and rides it around the aisles. SNAP. Damn! He's too fast. I'm trying so hard to get a good shot with my little cell phone camera. I get one that's okay, not great. He's becoming suspicious now. What's up with this photographic fervor?

"Renard, ride the stick pony for me!"

Now, it's so obvious that I have a secret motive and I've completely ignored the fact that these moments, while occurring frequently, must occur spontaneously. I'm so attached to getting the picture I want that I am killing every chance of having the rest of the night be magical. I'm not getting my way and now I'm MAD.

Pride just cleverly tricked me into inviting brother Anger to join us. Anger is the boss of the Party Poopers Union. He wins in most negotiations and then the fun is over. Uptown Saturday Night ends in Low Down Harahan Walmart, despite Renard's eventual appearance on a stick pony, parading in front of the sulking Lisa who is now sitting on a Walmart park bench near the cereal aisle. I refuse to photograph him. The thrill is gone. Shame on me for eschewing this good man's efforts to whip Anger's ass and send him back to whence he came.

I'm a true idiot if I don't learn from this.

As always, Renard and I work our way through a bunch of things and come out better in the end. I'm truly thankful that we can do that. I just hope, humbly, that we will never lose this. I have had a feeling for a long time now that I am supposed to be diligently working on the deconstruction my ideas of who and what I am so that I can replace them with their higher truths. The dynamics of a relationship seem to put these things right in our faces, if our eyes are open to them. So, as much as I hate having to confront these ugly moments of myself, they are tremendous opportunities for growth. And for that, I am most grateful for Renard and his part in at all.

Now, this is what Super Walmart looks like around 3:00 AM...including a picture of him on the banana bike, presented with his permission.

This is by far the BEST time to visit this store.

Renard found the perfect gift for the birthday girls.

My man, caught in a moment, doing his thing.

Ride a white mare in the footsteps of dawn...

Keep it clean.

Keep it stocked.

And I appreciate that they keep it open 24 hours a day and keep it cheap.

Up next, The Epic continues.
Stay tuned.


Blogger Lasciate said...

I agree...that IS the best time to end up at Wal*Mart.

2:38 PM  

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